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How to comfort a depression girlfriend?


Compared with other diseases, patients with psychiatric diseases often struggle alone. In addition to the pain of the disease itself, they suffer from a lot of suffering in the process of seeking medical treatment. This part may be overlooked by many people.



Major Depressive Disorder is not a depression emotion. What is needed is not comfort. For this reason, the subject must first understand.


Depressed patients have many abnormal and even contradictory behaviors during depressive episodes. Abnormalities such as the usual smiles of laughter and sorrow are contradictory. For example, if you accompany her, she is too annoyed, you are not with her, and she feels that you abandoned her. ,and many more. This is a normal reaction to depressive episodes.


Some people are eager to help each other in the face of depressive episodes of relatives and friends. To put it bluntly, how can I make you better, how can I stop you from being depressed?


In fact, these ideas just happened to be a taboo for depression.


When your girlfriend has a depressive episode, the first thing you need to do is to accept, that is, to admit her depressive episode, accept her depressive state, allow her to have symptoms, allow her to have emotions, and allow her to look abnormal. .


Instead of rushing to solve her depression. You can't solve it. only drugs are clear and effective when have a depressive episode.


We may have a sense of responsibility. When we see the pain of the people around us, we can't wait to lend a helping hand, hoping to help them solve the problem. However, depressive episodes are not a problem that can be solved by humans. Sometimes you are too anxious to let her get better. Instead,  reveal a kind of unacceptable reality about her illness. It seems that you are not allowed her to be depressed, as if to let her be depressed is your fault - not, so you don't need to worry about how to comfort your depressed girlfriend.


If you really want to do something for her, consider the following:


1, in the case that she will not endanger herself and others, follow her, whatever she wants to do, whether it is lying at home crying, or staring at the window at night to sleep, allowing her to get along with her depression.


2, stay with her as much as possible, but it is not to say that always with her,because you can't do things, she will not feel free. Just let her know that you are around, what needs you to respond in time, there is a constant sense of security. For people during a depressive episode, they may not want to eat or drink, and their personal hygiene is not very good. Occasionally - occasionally pour some water on her, ask her if she wants something to eat, and wash her face.


3. Don't force her to talk. If she talks to you, you will answer her. She won't say, don't let her always say, "It's fine to say it." This kind of thing does not exist.


4, if she shows the idea of being disgusted and self-destructive, don't say to her, "Think about the parents, think about the people who care about you." This will make her more guilty and more painful. Suicide is a relief for people with depression, so don't be too busy to stop them from thinking about it. After all, suicide is painless. The pain is the other people who live with memories and feelings. We ourselves do not suffer, and we are rushing to stop them from thinking about suicide. At least I personally feel that it is a selfish act. What I can do at this time is to try to understand her mood, such as guiding her to say why she has such an idea, to confirm and admit her pain, which will help her to ease her mood to some extent. Depressive episodes usually make them do not want to talk, so if they are willing to express pain, don't stop, allow expression, confirm pain, and accept, tell her that no matter what she thinks, you love her.


5, if she has a suicidal tendency, must be sent to the hospital, because this is not a problem you can solve, send her to the hospital is to love her ( no matter what, it means the hospital is The best prevent suicide  assistant).


As you said in your question, I want to go to a place where no one is staying for a few days. If you are not in a different place, or if she is in the city where the parents are, or if they are accompanied by you or her parents as much as possible, please refer to the above notes. . Don't tell me about her pull you into the blacklist and then you have no idea.